Everyone Loves Raymond
The popular TV sitcom “Everybody Loves Raymond” has been a family favorite for nine seasons. Though the show’s last season was in 2005, it is still aired on many networks all over the country and often during weekday primetime. The five central characters are sports writer Ray Barone, his opinioned homemaking wife Debra, his meddling parents Frank and Marie, and his life-challenged brother Robert. The differing personalities of the characters make each episode of family drama a hilarious and endearing experience. You can find the stations that are currently airing the show by visiting this link.
The following are four short character descriptions and video clips that demonstrate each of the DISC styles in action. The show to tends to focus on the styles' liabilites than assets, but that's what provides the humor. You need RealPlayer for the video clips, and if you don’t have it, an opportunity to download the free software is provided. Click on our provided link and when the webpage appears, click the hypertext “Click to start Realplayer and play your media” and clip will quickly download.
Click here to watch a video clip of Debra Barone
In this clip you will see Debra talking to Ray on a dinner date about why she shouldn’t be concerned about her aging looks. Though she is obviously attempting to reassure herself, her expressiveness and authoritative tone shows she is ready to take on the challenge.
Debra is a high-energy, expressive woman. She is a goal oriented individual who enjoys taking on a challenge (like replacing Marie’s typical family thanksgiving dinner by having fish as the main entrée’). She is not afraid to address uncomfortable family situations straight-on. Her direct and opinionated approach often back-fires as she tries to attack the problem with logic and reason. Examples of her “D” type personality can be seen in the self-assured clothing she wears (she’s not afraid to show her figure), her attempts to take charge or control of tedious situations, her willingness to disagree and argue her point with anyone in the family, and the difficulty she has in accepting constructive criticism from others.
Click here to watch a video of Frank Barone
In this clip you will see Frank is having an enjoyable moment with his family by describing some of his personal, colorful history. His wife Marie finds his behavior annoying so she clarifies his story in a way that makes him look stupid in front of everyone else. Frank immediately defends himself by making a witty but derogatory comment right back to her. It results in making the whole family feel uncomfortable.
Frank is sometimes an embarrassment to his family because of his off-the-wall comments and dry humor. Though not an ideal representative of the “I” type personality (or as a father) his most common traits are typical of that communication style. He enjoys finding humor in whatever situation he is in, and prefers personal amusement (eating, watching TV or laughing at his sons) over helping his nagging wife (Marie) with the responsibilities of the household. Frank has the most fun when gains his family’s entire attention by making a comedic statement right in the middle of a serious situation. He is an animated character who is a non-conformist but secretly cares about the affections of his family.
Click here to watch a video of Ray Barone
In this clip Ray has just come downstairs from putting the kids to sleep. He is proud of his accomplishment (being helpful in homemaking duties) and is looking forward to some appreciation from his wife and a relaxing evening reading the paper. As he finishes telling his wife a light and humorous anecdote, she responds by addressing his inadequacy in completing some other items he promised to do. His reaction is one of avoidance by trying to smooth over the situation with humor.
Ray is the central character of the show. He has a high-maintenance wife, three kids and nosy parents who live right next door. Most of his conundrums in marriage and family occur due to his desire to keep everyone happy and conflict free. He has trouble telling his wife his real concerns or feelings, and instead often opts to use deception for an end he believes is best for everyone. As is common with “S” type personalities, Ray does not like to hurt other people’s feelings. Some of his typical behavior includes secretly eating leftovers at his mom’s because of his wife’s poor cooking, not standing up to his mother when he should clearly take his wife’s side, and appearing indecisive when the right choice is tedious and uncomfortable. It is not unusual for him to withhold his feelings until he can’t stand everyone’s petty behavior anymore. He then blows up telling everyone the negative things he really thinks about each of them.
Click here to watch a video of Marie Barone
In this clip Marie is frustrated by her husband who is unwilling to eat her tuna salad. In the meticulous description of her cooking method, you can see that she doesn’t understand how her food is bad. Her criticizing husband who is unwilling to explain the reason for his distaste is driving her crazy.
Marie could probably be described as the most complex character of all the cast. Outside of her “C” type personality she is a doting mother who attempts to keep her sons tightly wrapped-up in her apron strings. She believes she can still manipulate them through her motherly love and affection. Where her character displays the “C” type communication style most predominately is in her desire for information (wants to know everything that is happening in the family), her perfectionist approach to cooking and cleaning, and her criticisms of those (mostly Debra) who cannot perform at the same level as she can in quality of housekeeping. When things start falling apart, she is usually the one most responsible for the situation but can only respond to her family’s frustration by asking why everyone is so unhappy. She has a difficult time reading other people’s emotions.
Recommended Web links
Communication Styles and Conflict
Description of a communication styles model similar to DISC but with additional facets of information
Provider of DISC assessments and other related assessments
Research conducted on the DISC assessment in validity and reliability
